Tuesday, April 19, 2011
14 DPO - Stop Worrying
Today is 14 days past ovulation, at 8 DPO I got a BFP, 9DPO it was confirmed with a blood test that I am pregnant. We are due between Dec 25-27. I am SCARED. Today I go to the Hematologist to start my shots of Heprin or Lovenox to maybe keep my baby alive. I cannot begin to say how nervous I am that it won't work. Everyone says, have faith, relax (theres that stupid word again!) if its meant to be, stop worrying....and so on. Yeah those people can really just go talk to themselves because I am not listening. Walk a mile in my shoes then tell me to not worry. How do you not worry when the babies you long for die inside of your body? Is there really a way to not worry? I really don't know if there is a way. Yes I love the Lord and yes I am in His hands, yes He will carry me me if something bad happens, but YES I am HUMAN so still I worry. I don't make myself sick over it, but I do worry. Anyway, say a prayer that this bean is the jingle bell I have been longing for, set to arrive in the season of our Saviours birth!! Glory to God for this miracle no matter how long or short the life is.